The lies of Adultery

Adultery has always been a tolerated evil in African Nigerian, evil because the Bible makes it quite clear that adultery is sin. In our present society it is often seen to be the lesser of two evils, the greater being Polygamy- marriage to more than one woman.Many a women are willingly to turn a blind eye to it as long as "he still caters for me and my children". The golden rule for cheating husbands has always been- avoid getting caught, what she does not know cannot hurt her, "after all I haven't brought another woman to the house yet".


I would like for us to consider adultery from two perspectives:
First the single lady dating a married man and subsequently the married woman having a sexual relationship with a married man (not her husband).

As we discuss the single ladies involved in adultery, let us first step away from the stereotype of the young and wild party girl who quite simply sleeps with anyone that can bankroll her excesses, but consider the sincere, hard working young lady who finds herself in a forbidden relationship with a married man her boss for instance or perhaps a family friend. Someone who over a period of time she had come to admire, trust and confide in.  Not surprising how admiration in moments of weakness could turn to lust (often mistaken as love), a few hugs here and there soon evolves to a few stolen kisses and before you know it we are neck deep in a fully blossoming adulterous relationship patronizing all the different hotels in town.


Then you say to yourself, am sure I can handle it, its only for a short time, a fling nothing serious after all boyfriend has not been acting right. Being roommates with their wives, married men are usually more apt at managing women emotions better than their single counterparts. So we are not surprised that the married lovers are usually more sensitive than the boyfriend. They are better at giving gifts and best of all you have no cooking or cleaning duties oh no that is mostly for the wife.
So at first the attention seems like fun but soon enough as the relationship progresses the game becomes less exciting and more bothersome. The fear of being caught constrains the evolution of the relationship into anything more meaningful other than sex. No late night calls, other calls are limited to times when wife or family are not within the vicinity, no house visits, no surprise work place visits, limited public sightings, no PDF public display of affection, no unsolicited text messaging etc.


Sooner or later two things usually happen in adulterous relationships, the married man could either damn the consequences of his wife finding out about his adulterous relationship and commit to it fully (here you see mistresses owing property and having children for their married lovers or becoming second or third wives). Else the relationship is brought to an end either through mutual consent or he simply stops calling or receiving your calls.


Either way, there are simply no "happily ever after" Cinderella endings for adulterous relationship as it never truly satisfies the woman's need for love, trust, companionship, and relevance.
Were the needs of the married lover met, most likely yes once the fleeting lustful desire has been satisfied one, maybe two or three years down the road.